Continue reading »]]> Last night I took a walk by myself for a few minutes just to enjoy the outside (it was almost dark ). The night was quiet, except for the hissing cicadas and humming of air conditioning units as I walked by each home.  Not sure what spurred this memory, but I almost started laughing out loud. Here goes.

When IMB (oldest daughter) was about 4,  she was jabbering away at the kitchen table while hub and I were clearing the dinner dishes and putting them in the washer. After several minutes of incessant talking, my wonderful hub says “IMB, please stop talking and finish your dinner”.

Without hesitation, and very clearly, my beautiful angel responds in a sweet voice with “Daddy, when you talk, All I hear is blah, blah, blah….”.

WHAT THE EFF DID YOU JUST SAY?!

Trying to be a stoic parent, I cover my mouth to hide the HUGE smile I was sporting (and trying SO hard not to laugh incessantly). Hub, well, he was stunned. He stopped loading the dishes and mouthed “WTF?! Where did she hear that?!” in my direction. Again, I was trying not to bust a gut.   But we were also both shocked and wondering – Where did she hear that?

A few nights later, we were watching the non-stop scrolling on the TV Guide channel, (you know the one that takes 4 hours to go through all the channels available) when a commercial came on for Seinfeld. In this trailer, Elaine is talking to Cramer and he is going on and on, and she says “Cramer, when you talk, all I hear is blah, blah, blah.”. BINGO.  Now I know where she got it.

I will say, although hub and I were stunned that our little angel, at the tender age of FOUR, would utter those words, we were also very proud of our munchkin for using the phrase in context at the precise moment she should.  Smart ass in training.

You think you're a smart ass daddy? Well bring it.

Tell me about something your kid said that made you think “WTF?!”.

Continue reading »]]> Over the next few weeks, I went to the doctor several times for more ultrasounds and blood work, to make sure everything seemed to be progressing as expected.  The strange thing was, I was feeling HORRIBLE. With my daughters, I had the usual morning sickness and tiredness, but this was different. VERY different.  I just didn’t “feel” right. It was almost as though I had the flu. I was exhausted, not interested in food (and that in itself is a HUGE red flag for me!), and just generally feeling like crap. I would crawl into a chair after work, and hardly move until bedtime. My wonderful hub did all he could to keep our house running; feeding the girls, laundry, etc.

Each day, I chalked my symptoms up to age. “I’m AMA”, I though. (And for those of you that don’t know, AMA is short for “Advanced Maternal Age’. Otherwise known as OLD. But at 36, I sure didn’t FEEL old.)

Due to my AMA, I was sent to see a perinatal specialist who would do a workup and tell me the risks, etc., etc. I wasn’t worried. I had delivered two beautiful children already, so a third would be no biggie, right?

September 13, 2010 will be a date burned in my memory for some time. That was the date of my first perinatal visit. I went by myself, thinking it would be a simple routine ultrasound to check and make sure everything was fine. Again, I had no worries in the world. I remember as I sat in the exam room waiting to see the doctor, the power kept flickering off and on. The nurse would come in and turn back on all the machines and reboot them, only to have them go out again. It must have happened 4 or 5 times while I was there. Dr. Stanley finally came in and we chatted, small talk – “Do you know why you are here?, Do you have any questions?”, etc..

As he performed the ultrasound, he was quiet.  After a few minutes he started to explain what he was looking at. “Do you see this space here?”, he asked. “This is called the Nuchal Translucency or Nuchal Fold. It is the space between the spinal column and the back of the neck. “, he explained. “A high NT reading can be an indication of issues with the baby. Your baby has a high NT number here which is of concern.”

My heart started pounding a million beats a minute and a flurry of thoughts raced through my head. What the hell did he just say??? Did I hear him right? Why in the WORLD did I insist that my husband not come with me???

I tried my best to wrap my head around what he was telling me. I collected my thoughts and then proceeded to ask the questions that I could think of in such a short amount of time. “What are the potential issues?”, I asked through my tears. He was focused and calm, and began explaining the possibilities. “Heart Defects, Downs Syndrome, Chromosomal Abnormalities. At this point, I can’t be absolutely sure, but I can tell you that there is a high probability something is not right.”  He offered to send me to Dallas for an early amino-type procedure called a CVS. I declined, but did decide an early amnio would be a good idea to know what we might be dealing with.

He said he could perform it in two weeks. September 27th, 2010. Another date burned in my mind.

Continue reading »]]> The beginning of school started like most other years – excitement about which teacher each daughter would get, who’s in which class, etc., etc. By August 1st, I was ahead of the curve. Uniforms purchased – Check.  School supplies ordered -check. Monogrammed backpacks & new lunch boxes shipped – double check. It felt good to get the school year off to a great start.

All of these things turned out to be a total blessing in disguise. You see, it was around the last week in July that I realized I could be pregnant. Somewhat scared of the thought (the Oh Shit, what have I done mentality), I put off taking a pregnancy test. I can’t be pregnant, I’m too old. (FYI – I was 36 at the time…)  I finally decided that I needed to know – so I peed on the test- all the time thinking to myself- yea right, this is a waste of my time. Boy was I wrong.

I came out of the restroom and approached my darling husband of almost 15 years, who happened to be in the shower at the time. “Honey, how do you feel about a third child?”, I said.  Somewhat confused by the question, he responded with “I’m fine with it, but why are you asking me this question?”.

“Because I’m pregnant”, I announced. Slightly startled and in true husband fashion, he said “Ok, but are you sure?”.   Seriously?? Am I SURE??

Now, some background here. When I became pregnant with our first daughter, my husband did not understand nor trust home pregnancy tests. When I told him I was pregnant with our now almost 10 year old daugther, he responded with the exact same question as above. In fact, he then proceeded to ask me whether or not I had been to a doctor to “confirm” it.

So, hearing the words “Are you sure?” from his mouth was not surprising at all. He continued to shower, as thought I had announced we were having pancakes for breakfast, not that we were about to expand our family. He may have been sweating bullets on the inside, but on the outside he was cool as a cucumber. “I told you I didn’t want to be a new dad at 40, so if this kid is born in March 2011, then I’ll only be 39 – so we just made the cutoff.” Funny dear, very funny…

I called the doctors office that afternoon and booked an appointment to have an early ultrasound done due to some spotting I was having. I went in at 5weeks 5 days and there it was. The flicker of a beating heart on the monitor. Yep – definitely pregnant.

Continue reading »]]> Since 2007, my wonderful husband and I had wrestled with the thought of having a third child. Some days I would think – heck yea, I want one! The next week, it would be – man would our lives change. Those words have new meaning to me now….

I missed being pregnant. I loved feeling the little squirt kicking inside my belly, poking its feet into my rib cage, and causing unbelievable heartburn. I was a “good” pregnant woman – only a little nausea here and there; tired for sure- but that was really it. Due to complications with my second daughter, I really didn’t get to enjoy the pregnancy like my first. I was on bed rest from 27 weeks on -and it wasn’t fun. So, being pregnant again really appealed to me.

One last time I thought. Just once.

Continue reading »]]> So the “Spice Girls” (aka the Bice Girls) started school last week – early in my opinion. August 13th – seriously? What happened to starting AFTER Labor Day?

I am excited and a bit sad. The oldest will be in 3rd Grade – but the baby – well, has grown up. She put on her size 4 jumper and pressed peter-pan collared shirt and headed off to Kindergarten. Bittersweet to say the least.

The good part is the teacher is the bomb. I don’t know too many people that would look forward to spending eight straight hours with 20 five- & six-year-olds, but she does. One of her well-known character traits is to sing. She sings in the morning, she sings before lunch, she sings just about anytime the mood  hits her. Funny enough, now my 5-year old is beginning to do it. Yesterday in the car – we were driving home from school and I hear this sweet, soft voice coming from the back seat. I can’t remember exactly what she was singing about (I think it might have been about bunnies – but it is really irrelevant..)  Teachers (good ones) can have such an influence….

My sister-in-law is also a teacher. A great one. I have never seen her teach, but I hear her stories and see all the effort and work she puts into it, and I know there are some lucky kids out there benefiting. I only hope she realizes how good she is.

Here’s to all the great teachers out there.

Continue reading »]]> the busy mother. Comparable to a symphony director, but replace the experienced cellist, and world-renowned pianist with two children, four and eight respectively, and you’ll be close. Bathroom breaks, Goldfish snacks (because answering with “We’ll be having dinner in less than an hour…” when the four-year-old is hungry may get you burned at the stake.) and clothes that “don’t feel right” are part of daily life.

I am blessed with two beauties. The oldest is eight, going on eighteen, and the youngest reminds me what it is like to still be a child. However, I’m still amazed – to this day- that two children from the same gene pool can be so completely different. I recently read “The Birth Order” by Dr. Kevin Leman and honestly, thought he wrote the book just for me. Our oldest daughter is the epitome of the “Oldest Child”. Smart, Adult-like, and a by-the-book kind of girl. In her mind, rules are NOT made to be broken – they are to be followed, to a T. Then the youngest came along and the universe turned upside down. The youngest is, let’s say, easy-going. The “I want to wear pajamas in the car to the donut shop” kind of gal. Of course, this is not right in the eyes of the eight-year old. Pajamas are to be worn to bed, not to the donut shop.

Of course, I bear a great deal of responsibility for this character trait the oldest exhibits. I, too, am an oldest. And if that wasn’t bad enough, so is her father. I am trying to be more flexible, hoping it might rub off on her. Hope is the key word there…